"What happens to a dream deferred? Does it shrivel up like a raisin in the sun?" - Langston Hughes
Last academic, year I had the opportunity to teach AP English Literature and Composition. Harlem (A Raisin in the Sun) was one of the bodies of work I selected for the students to analyze. The students had to identify literary techniques; themes, tone, and setting, to name a few. (Yup, I had them children working!)
By the end of the analysis the reason the poem was selected was revealed to be, not only for the students, but for me. I had always wanted to be a teacher, and I was presented with the opportunity to experience teaching, but that wasn't the only dream I had. There were other things I wanted to pursue, had started pursuing, but life got MeSsy.
I was still brunching and fetéing, living and loving, mom'ing and working, but I was unknowingly living with a MonSter. Many people refer to the MonSter as, the invisible disease. It lives with you and shows up differently, depending on the day and the person, but it is consistently a mess. Brunch with Tee became Brunch with MS Tee because Tee received a diagnosis of Multiple Sclerosis right when she was getting started, living out her dreams.
No, you didn't misread, I have been diagnosed with the autoimmune condition, Multiple Sclerosis. At first, I was all
because ain't no way on God's good Earth, my body was jumping bad with itself, not after all we had been through together. We (my body and I) had been rocking for almost 40 years (at the time) and all of sudden it wanted to war with me. Talk about life interrupted!
Looking back, I had experienced numerous symptoms of Multiple Sclerosis but didn't know they were symptoms. I thought all the various conditions were occurring in a silo. Why did I feel so tired all the time, to the point that getting out of bed was a chore? Why was I having these random shooting pains in my legs and arms? Why couldn't I sleep? Why were my fingertips numb? I got treatment for each individual condition until the MeSsy One made me pay attention to her. I can't lie and say I wasn't mad, confused, or scared but what I was, and will always be, is a child of the King.
Between God, my MS Specialist, my family and my friends, I have learned to truly find peace and even blessings amid the chaos, the disappointments, and the mess. Every day is different, some days I forget I have this diagnosis, other days, the MeSsy One rears her hateful head. But this isn't the same Tee from the last blog. This Tee has renewed hope, faith and dreams bigger than ever before. So, since I took some time away to reintroduce myself to myself, allow me to reintroduce this blog to you. This is Brunch with MS Tee! We are still going to talk, laugh, cry, scream, brunch and clink our champagne glasses, no matter what! I'm not about to let a diagnosis stop me from reaching my full potential. That's the energy we're on over here! So, pull up a chair and grab your champagne flute because our table is ready!
"What happens to a dream deferred? Does it shrivel up like a raisin in the sun?...Or does it EXPLODE?" - Langston Hughes
Let's Chat: What do you do when disappointments come your way? How do you remain positive? Comment below.
Side note: Listen to your body when it speaks to you. If something feels off chances are something is off.